Wednesday 25 September 2013

Review: Own the Wind by Kristen Ashley

Title:  Own the Wind

Series:  Chaos

Author:  Kristen Ashley 

Published:  2nd April 2013

Why I read it: To whoever added this to the group and proceeded to vote for it: I hate you and I'll send you poop for your birthday, till the end of time.

It’s not me, it’s you book, all you!

This book made me so mad that I wanted to chuck my laptop out the window. I will never pick up a book by this author[side note: the female character from another of her books should have clued me in that this wasn’t for me, but it serves to see that I am a masochist; who the hell sleeps with a dude for over 6 months without knowing his name?!] or from this contemporary sub-genre.

I try never to do this since I respect authors a lot, but WHAT THE HELL Ms. Ashley? WHAT THE HELL? If you need synonyms use a frigging thesaurus not the same word over and over and over and over and over and over again! See how annoying that is, see?? Examples of great literature(and this only from 2 or 3 pages):

“Baby, bein’ your safe harbor doesn’t come with me gettin’ pissed when you gotta do what you gotta do when you gotta do it.


Jason hated my apartment. Not frequently but often enough to make his point, when we were cuddling on the couch watching TV or he was sitting on a stool at the bar watching me ruin dinner, he’d say something like, “Can’t wait until we can get you out of this pit.” It wasn’t a pit. It was old and worn, but it wasn’t a pit. Jason thought it was a pit. Looking at Shy leaning into the counter, he didn’t look like he thought my place was a pit.

Thank you for repeating it. I really enjoyed that. I did!
That sucks, huge, so huge it’s impossible to measure how huge that sucks, it’s that huge.

My last neuron... he just died from sadness.

It's like the characters are retarded: they repeat what other character said or repeat what they said/thought some moments ago. Are you all so dim?? Do you have a memory problem? Besides that I don't understand the thought patterns of any of these characters, they have so convoluted ways of considering problems and talking that I just couldn’t keep up.

Apart from this MAJOR problems, let me tell you about the characters… We have the death-to-feminism-and-other-diseases hero who is the perfect example of the ‘80s bodice reapers dudes. It’s obvious he hates women and disrespects them(the overuse of the word “bitch” gave him away) and, like in those novels, I presume he’ll come to see that HIS woman, not all the gender, are worthy of respect. Besides this dominant character flaw he can’t just make up his mind: he disrespects, talks down to and insults the heroine and then he wanders why she avoids his shitty ass, shame on her for doing it too!

Now, the heroine… she is the washed out copy of a snarky heroine and to add to it, stupid as well. He reduces her to tears, literally, and after 2 years or so he’s the best thing from toilet paper! This Tabitha[every time I see the name I think of the amazing character from dark Hunters that this idiot doesn’t even come close to] is from the earthworm-brained, TSTL category: she can’t make up her mind, is a coward and shacks up with the king of the world from above.

Additionally the names from this books… I hate them. I don’t want to get into this since it will take me forever, but what the hell names are those?!

All in all, I came to the conclusion that this biker book, and maybe all the others, is the re-enactment of the 80s bodice rippers, but with crappy clothing, bad language, stupid people, lesser manners, an uglier setting and the “fuck you grammar, I hate you” attitude. And if we are really lucky, we might find drug dealers and arms dealers too!

All this was brought after 20% of reading, imagine what I could have done if I read more... I shudder in fear.

Rating: rating0

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